From Ambition to Meaning

I am losing the ambition and the drive that I had been generating.

After being laid off from work I was extra busy establishing new work and identity in this world. I had four creative projects to work on. Those projects, like all things, have a life of their own and are not in the forefront now. They all seem to be on hold and I have no idea how or if they will continue to unfold. They all seem to be in a sprout stage and further growth is determined by more parts than me alone. It always comes back to response from others in this world.

A couple of weeks ago I took a breath and noticed a new momentary quality since my unemployment began. Could I really relax and slow down? Could I live without fear and enjoy this new cycle? Yes! I am now doing that! I am loosely letting go of my projects that give me a sense of contribution in this world. I am no longer busy doing...I am now BEING! This feminine nature of stillness deserves as much recognition and honor as the masculine nature of action.

Wayne Dyer's movie From Ambition to Meaning comes to mind. Something shifted for me and that's the way it is with life cycles and circles. Shifts are signs of changing seasons. No judgement...no shame...of self or others when one is aware of the sacred circle of life. One simply keeps moving. It's a very green place and that makes me very happy and not lonely at all! I guess that means I feel connected to an energy source and an energetic expression.