We Are Family

Coffee and conversation with oldest daughter. I always appreciate time with her. Talk looped back around to the same old issue of my choices when she was 5. We exchanged intense words...from different angles. I noticed that my ground did not hold the same old emotion of shame and guilt. As we parted I wondered if her ground had changed also. Nothing happens in a vacuum. Could it be that old tapes and old stories may be told/repeated through empty words? As if there is no steam but the form keeps chugging along. At some point that form will change altogether...it's an alchemical process.

I walked into their house after 5.5 month absence. He and I looked at each other eye to eye and he said, "So, you want things to be the way they were?" I said, "No." "You want things to be better?" "Yes, if possible," was my response. Happiness is playing kick-ball with my g-son and walking around the block talking with my g-daughter and taking both of them to the YMCA for Taekwondo. I learned a lot from this experience. I do not live/breathe in a vacuum. I am grateful for healing through open hearts...my own that was able to be humble through this drama and apologize and for their hearts that held space for transition. Amazing power of words and actions...and the consequent management of those effects in this world.