Shine On 2010

I found the illustrator for my Turtle's Circle of Life children's book today!!! She's a Reike Master and knows about energy patterns and flow.

I'm excited to bring Circle of Life to life via a radio series, community event, film and book. All I need is that "green" stuff!! I heard that it falls from trees! I am a tree!

It was my goal to submit my first grant before the new year. So I sent the grant that I've been working on for weeks to the film producer I just met on the radio program. He had mentioned that he could share it with people he knows.

I interviewed Dana Lyons on the radio program yesterday. It will air January 17. Interviewing is another learning curve. I noticed something new: I feel free-flowing affection toward Dana. It's a wholesome and healthy feeling that I'm sure has to do with new boundaries. It's as if love has more pores through which to flow.

What a creative year it's going to be!

Healing Universe

I didn't know how much my children meant to me until I broke our family system apart by something I said. As a result I'm reaching out to my children and the two that were not directly involved in the collision are showing me that they are there. This means so much to me. It looks like it will take more time for the others to heal.

I had a collision with someone recently and we didn't speak for a week. In one phone conversation early this week the conflict turned into order and increased clarity. Why does one system spiral upward and the other stay in conflict?

It takes two to heal. Two to open their hearts, forgive themselves by taking personal responsibility and forgiving the other. This takes maturity.

I've learned that my children help me ground. And for the first time in my life I'm telling them that I need them in my life.

Purification is an amazing journey that gets increasingly pointed in both dark and light aspects. It carries an image of sword/line through the middle of an energetic radiant circle. It looks much like a Quasar -- a fire hose whhiping through space.

Radio Waves & DRAGN

I turned to the History channel and learned about The Universe:

~ pulsar radio waves and its killer radiation
~ neutron stars
~ Earth's pending collision with Andromeda
~ Something can be so black that it's bright
~ Black holes inside Quasars are called monsters
~ DRAGN is Double Radio Active Galactic Nuclea
~ Radio galaxies = blazares

There are three different names for the same kind of star (pulsar, quasar, blazar) but they are actually the same. They look different based on the viewing angle or line of sight.

So, does this not suggest that we can communicate via radio waves with other star intelligences?

A New Garden in 2010

One ray of light is powerful....when two or more come together...Wow!

Yesterday at the radio studio I was honored to be on the air with two Native American musicians. Much of the show was impromptu due to one guest not showing up. For my Poetry Wheel segment I read Circles by Black Elk (a poem that opens my Circle of Life class) and Gene Tagaban accompanied with drum.

I learned that Gene and I are doing similar work with Circle classes and Elder storytellers. He told me about The Urban Longhouse he and a friend opened in Bellingham. I asked about doing a Circle of Life event there with Elder storytellers, traditional storytellers and Dana Lyons. When I thought about Dana in this event I heard his Tree story/song speak. Then I thought about his Drop of Water -- a song that I love. I'm thinking that Dana can honor the four directions with four of his songs.

A filmmaker was also at the radio station with us. When I asked about a CD of Elder storytellers they suggested a DVD or film. So, I spoke with filmaker RJ this morning and he told me that he can interview elders, film the event and create a DVD as well as shorter versions for various communication outlets. He mentioned Al Gore's film Inconvenient Truth and how there were three story threads throughout the film. So, we will use this model for a Circle of Life film.

I'm thinking that Turtle's Circle of Life(a "creation story" as Roger Fernandez called it) might want to be an oral story and that I'm the elder to tell it. Part of me would love to animate that as it's about my personal journey and my spirit name is Yellow Turtle Spirit in Laughing Waters. To tell the story orally I'd have to use both sides of my brain as well as my whole body. It could be very fun and satisfying! Scary too!

What an amazing fertile field of dark and light forces revealing how they work in a dynamic circle of life to integhrate people, ideas and actions. The labor in this garden continues with grant writing to find the funding for Elders' storytelling via the radio, an event and its players and a film. I love this work!

Paranormal Activity

I learned about an area near a mountain that has paranormal activity. Space craft are seen there. I hope to camp there and join others who are reaching out to celestial beings.

Blue and White Arc

Does not "virgin birth" suggest androgyny? Does not androgyny represent wholeness and holyness? Is not Madonna/Mother Mary/Sacred Feminine the birth canal/channel for Light?

Two-edged sword "cuts" both ways. Cutting is a purifying. One way is outside in. I determine the quality of life-force that surrounds me and the degree to which others come close. The other way is inside out. I determine the quality of life-force that goes out to touch people and all life forms. I notice that the "plants" I nurture are fragile and I am more aware now of how I relate. I notice that my being is fragile and I choose quality control. Two-edge sword increases awareness through cause and effect.

Had a dream about a male "lover". We pressed into each other and kissed passionately but it was not sexual in the old sense. I told him about Tracker antics so there would be another eye watching along with me. At one point I stood back to identify this man. It was then the sun shone on his bare chest revealing thick golden hair. When I thought about this later I was reminded of a golden field of wheat. (My dad had a hairy chest and I am still attracted by this --even in my dreams!)

December 24 was a dark night of the soul. I was distraught about the family disconnect and I had not seen my grandkids for two months. I hit an emotional bottom like never before. As I went with the dark waves I did wonder if this was another cycle where more light would be at the end of the tunnel. I had also wondered when I was connecting with Archangel Michael if this high would bring around a low. Sure enough! It's during this darkness that I ask, "What's the point." It feels like a pity party and that I don't fit in this world. I want be on the other side with my spirit allies/guides/angels. Making that cross over is not easy however and seems to be out of my hands so to speak. I'm too afraid to drive over a steep cliff or take pills. There seems to be some boundary around taking my life so that I can fit in somewhere else. I tell this part of my story because it's honest. Life on a spiritual path is not always bliss. I need to tell this dark side of my story...others go here as well. We all share both ends of the emotional spectrum. When the darkness lifted in the middle of the night on December 25 I noticed a surge of energy that was directing me toward my grant writing for my Native Elder Storytelling project. Okay...here we go again. This has happened so many times. It's as if the darkness is a purification and new space is created with new vision and energy. That sword represents the whole spectrum.

During this ordeal I reached out for my Angel Micheal. He offered me something: an arc of cobalt blue and white. One band next to the other. This is a "ray" of protection. Blue reminds me of my Dragon and my reptilian lineage.

This morning I awoke and did my "mind mapping" considering the aspects of my world. All of a sudden I was seeing a landscape below me. There was a lot of machinery and I was rising higher and higher and then we swerved. I was then in another realm and saw some men walking by and toward a wall. One of the men walked toward me with gift of blue jewels in his hands. The other three men had bad intentions. I was floating about working to stay invisible. I was able to lose the men and when I turned around I saw one of the men had a knife and in the next dream frame the bad guy punched the good guy with the blue jewels in the face. Then to close these dream frames I saw in the NE an oval shape of light as if it was bounded with white shining pearls.

Space craft. Are angels extraterrestials who visit Earth? Are they depicted with wings because the fly between realms? Astral travelling happens through inner eye. It is this eye at center that connects us with intelligent love. What does "eye" have to do with sword? Is this one light beam?

I had thought of sun rays and beams as a straight line. This new blue/white arc holds different information. Maybe when light presses into matter it arcs. I think Einstein speaks of this...I have notes of this somewhere.

Debate

I was watching a panel on CNN discuss life after death and reincarnation. There was one skeptic and a few others who believed in this phenomena. I noticed emotional volleying with defensiveness and blame/accusation. Debates are no place for emotion. Debates are pure logic or so it seems to me. Debates are a waste of time in my book. Heart to heart exchange is a different story. This latter ground is what we need to be tilling and not the same old political grounds. Who will create space for heart to heart dialogue?

Androgyny & Light Beings

A couple of weeks ago I had a dream about the singer Modanna. She was very white in full body facing me. She had infant-like male genitilia. The dream reminded me of androgyny.

Last week I was emailing someone about my first encounter with Archangel Michael and how "he" was a teacher. Later when I saw the "he" I got that it should read "s/he". Again...androgyny.

After the post yesterday I am seeing that this newly sealed and protected circular space that I am is androgynous. I am self-contained and whole. I am "holy" a word that conjures up mental concepts and perceptions. Holy for me is meaning that I am sacred space. I choose my behavior and I choose who I let into my space. Unhealthy patterns take time to heal...it's a thinning out process into the Light of Seeing and Knowing. Light is both teacher and healer. Angelic Light Beings lead the way.

Sexuality takes on new dimension. I no longer give parts of myself away when there is nothing that can come back around to nourish my whole self. I nurture my emotional, mental and physical bodies.

The most satisfying relationship/work that I have/do now is in my two circle gardens. I feel like an artist, a co-creator. Is this sexuality? Yes, its a dispersement of Fire throughout the whole energy field of Self. This sexuality is not found only in lower chakras but threads its way with sparks throughout one whole system.

In my experience Angels respond to passion. Joseph Campbell encourages us to "follow our bliss." How many choose to do that? For me those choices find me living a very simple and humble life. It's a life that makes me happy.

Eden's Boundaries

Laser (water) light (fire) beam contacts Earth (earth) penetrating matter creating new space (air). This drilling into dark matter releases both positive and negative ions.

Ions definition: an atom or molecule which has gained or lost one or more of its valence electrons, giving it a net positive or negative electrical charge.

Too many negative ions creates imbalance and demonic states. Not sure what too many positive ions would create??? Would it be too angelic?

I seem to have, or I am, a two edged sword. I sever and I bind relationships. If love is present binding or healing can happen. If there is not a foundation of loving substance with another person a cutting of connection can happen. I am making these choices day by day.

This sword of Truth that I am threw a family system into a tailspin and out of its normal orbit. A couple of the male "orbs" reacted in the same way toward me with defensiveness and then accusation and blame. I kept reaching out because this system is close to my heart and I've invested blood, sweat and tears into it. There has been response so that a conversation has ensued. Hopefully healing will continue. The overall effect is that relationships are going deeper. We are getting into new emotional territory and learning more about ourselves and one another...and we are learning about healthy boundaries.

Gardening stirs up ions as does sexual intercourse. Both include penetration of earthy matter. Both involve intimacy at one level or another. When there is a whole person gardening or engaging in sex the experience is holy. And the exact opposite is true. Demonic or angelic substance is released when water, fire, earth and air combine or join. It all depends on the "state of the union" and the wholesomeness of intent or what's invisible (in spirit) behind visible action.

Women need to be much more protective of their earth matter. Opening up to men for shallow reasons can be a depleting experience...a selling of one's very Soul and Sol. Women need to set boundaries to protect themselves. When a whole man and a whole woman come together exchanging spiritual, emotional, mental and physical substance a Garden of Eden can blossom. In the meantime we need to learn what it means to be a whole person and at the same time teach our children and grandchildren. It's not okay to accept standards of the past when people were unholy and unwholesome. It's time to set new standards because we are new in Light of shining Love.