Toxins & Lymph system

Light penetrates more deeply into matter and the collective body stirring up heavy and dark toxins. What system removes them from the body? In my body it feels like a "t" where horizontal and vertical lines meet. A lot of stillness is required through this pressure of negativity. Thank goodness I know not to claim it as mine. This is a collective process and many will not go there. However there are points in the body such as lymph nodes whose function is to remove impurities.

The lymphatic system in vertebrates is a network of conduits that carry a clear fluid called lymph. It also includes the lymphoid tissue that the lymph travels through. Lymphoid tissue is found in many organs, particularly the lymph nodes, and in the lymphoid follicles associated with the digestive system such as the tonsils. The system also includes all the structures dedicated to the circulation and production of lymphocytes, which includes the spleen, thymus, bone marrow and the lymphoid tissue associated with the digestive system.

A Lymph node is an organ consisting of many types of cells, and is a part of the lymphatic system. Lymph nodes are found throughout the body, and act as filters or traps for foreign particles and contain white blood cells. Thus they are important in the proper functioning of the immune system.

An immune system is a collection of mechanisms within an organism that protects against disease by identifying and killing pathogens and tumor cells. It detects a wide variety of agents, from viruses to parasitic worms, and needs to distinguish them from the organism's own healthy cells and tissues in order to function properly. Detection is complicated as pathogens adapt and evolve new ways to successfully infect the host organism.

Alchemical Mercury

I went through daily motions yesterday but was in a "funk." I'm still not sunny and clear at core. This is not logical.

I awoke to a roundish face with beady dark eyes. It said, "Light will never find me." I said, "Light just did." Did my "projection" find that critter?

Is liquid silver metallic? Is it toxic? The beasts of silver dream were intriguing. I know it has to do with alchemy. Tracker weighs on me. It takes a lot out of me to deal with his force in my space. When I express kindness his way he thinks I'm being receptive to him. I'm not. I can't. I wish he would change.

Mercury from Alchemy Electronic Dictionary

Mercury, called quicksilver by the ancients, is a liquid metal that could be found weeping through cracks in certain rocks or accumulating in small puddles in mountain grottos. It was also obtained by roasting cinnabar (mercury sulfide). The shiny metal would seep from the rocks and drip down into the ashes, from which it was later collected. The early alchemists made red mercuric oxide by heating quicksilver in a solution of nitric acid. The acid, which later alchemists called "aqua fortis," was made by pouring sulfuric acid over saltpeter. The reaction of quicksilver in nitric acid is impressive. A thick red vapor hovers over the surface and bright red crystals precipitate to the bottom. This striking chemical reaction demonstrated the simultaneous separation of mercury into the Above and the Below. Mercury's all-encompassing properties were exhibited in other compounds too. If mercury was heated in a long-necked flask, it oxidized into a highly poisonous white powder (white mercuric oxide) and therapeutic red crystals (red mercuric oxide). Calomel (mercury chloride) was a powerful medicine, unless it was directly exposed to light, in which case it became a deadly poison. When mixed with other metals, liquid mercury tended to unite with them and form hardened amalgams. These and other properties convinced alchemists that mercury transcended both the solid and liquid states, both earth and heaven, both life and death. It symbolized Hermes himself, the guide to the Above and Below.

Winds of Change

A man walked through my door the other day to give me some information. We chatted. He told me about his church and one of their foundations of living: "What would love do?" We talked about overpopulation and what "Be fruitful and multiply" really means. He told me about his Aluet Tribe and that he works with tribes across the state. He was at the same river pow-wow I was at a couple of weeks ago. I like him. He likes my "spirit" my "energy" and emailed so. We may spend some time together. No fireworks...just calm blues and greens. Can a new friendship be this effortless -- and simply walk through one's door?

Dream 1:
At a gathering. People are told to get into position/line up. I move next to tracker. I have a biege colored animal at my left side; he has a similar animal on his right. I speak directly to him wanting to hear his voice to make sure it's him. He is reluctant to speak. He wants to be invisible. He mumbles. I can't hear him. I ask him several times to speak up. The repeated asking took effort. I then heard him say something about his personal life. He was emotional and in grief. I put my hand on his face extending comfort and love. Then a huge wind comes in right to left -- East to West. We both hunker down holding the ground. Finally it's quiet. I'm alone on a path and see large screens set up for an event. I ride my bike back along the path but cannot take it down the rocky terrain. Then the bike is in pieces. I will have to fit it back together again. I look at the pieces logically and see how to do so.

Dream 2:

Two animals panther like (tracker and I) are coated in liquid silver. We are both lean, long and strong. They/we line up one to one and begin to fight. One goes for the neck/shoulder area of the other. Then someone is showing me a chart with lines and points -- like acupuncture. Then I'm shown a three dimensional display of marbles moving along lines and points showing me how the system works. Then a social gathering with women wearing a lot of body painting/tattoos.

Archangels Gathering Force

Woke up with message for Tracker:

I see you in white light. I see your archangels around your shoulders and head. The message is:

Rise up and integrate your missing soul parts. Do your grief work...work that you taught me about years ago. Knowing about something is not knowing. Knowing includes right brain and whole body. Be humble. In so doing the beams that you project will have healing integrating force.

You are loved in light.

Black Magic / White Magic

I wrote this many years ago as I was starting my spiritual journey. I had no idea how these powers would play out in my life:

Black magic is the use of mind power to gain an objective in the physical universe – usually done by force and mental strength against another’s will or to move objects into one’s own orbit for self comfort and indulgence (negative power).

White magic is the use of spiritual power to gain an objective in the spiritual universes done by giving up one’s own will to God’s desire for him/her, and by following this desire regardless of where the path my lie and whatever hardships may be.

Darts

Tracker's signals come into this feminine body as sharply pointed darts. Why would a man do this to the female body? What's wrong with this picture?

Women are not safe with this type of male. Earth is not safe. Wake up and change.

Signals

Some men act like vultures / predators when sex is mentioned. As if that is the center of their world. As if sexual appetite drives them. I suspect Goddess tradition chose the men to join them in ceremony. And those men would not be the vultures. Those types short circuit life force. Female body knows the difference. She picks up the signals.

Atlas

I'm having phases of disorientation (it just now cleared) reminding me of that kundalini snap at the back of the neck in England so many years ago. This time I'm noticing that there are two minor "chords" along both sides of the major spinal chord. This is effecting my head shoulder relationship reminding me of brain stem. I also notice that lymph node at upper left jaw is sore. Maybe I have three serpentine heads and not one. No wonder I'm getting headaches and have to be still and horizontal. At least this time I don't have little children to take care when all I can do is be still. I wonder if some serious physical sex will help the spaceyness. Reminds me of Goddess stories and supposedly how certain men were chosen to be of service to Goddess. Did that really work? What about the emotional body that's so connected to the physical and mental body? Don't men and women want to go deeper into spiritual intimacy? How does love work anyway? I know there is a crystalline pattern but I don't think that means superficial or ritualistic sex. But I don't know for sure...I'm a student of Lifes force.

The picture of "bone" atlas on wikipedia looks like a triangle.
In anatomy, the atlas is the topmost (first) cervical vertebra of the spine.

It is named for the Atlas of mythology, because it supports the globe of the head.

The atlas is the topmost vertebra, and – along with the Axis – forms the joint connecting the skull and spine. The atlas and axis are specialized to allow a greater range of motion than normal vertebrae.

The Atlas' chief peculiarity is that it has no body, and this is due to the fact that the body of the atlas has fused with that of the next vertebra (the Axis). Its other peculiarities are that it has no spinous process, is ring-like, and consists of an anterior and a posterior arch and two lateral masses.

Polarity Shift

I continue to watch my thoughts noticing negative patterns about self and others. I'm talking myself out of them and reversing their polarity. This is creating a new sense of transparency. Last night as I was listening to live music I noticed how core felt like a crystal.

I'm not sure what good floating and light headedness does in this realm. I'm in the process of making sense of it all. A re-orientation.

What anchors one to this realm?

Wandering as Therapy

Storytelling used to happen around fires. Now they most often happen via the media, a publishing company and technology. A story requires a sender and a receiver.

Woke up with left shoulder aching/talking to me. Do I go to the spa or get another massage? I did neither. I went wandering. Along my bike path there are open fields of tall grass, nettles, willows and cottonwoods. One area that I had not yet explored caught my eye inviting me in. I went there this morning.

One summer past the path I chose led to a tent. I avoided that area after that. This morning the path led me to a campsite with beer cans and debris. I piled everything on the old blanket lying there. I thought I would leave it like that but then realized I would take it all out of there. From there I walked to another willow area. As I was "swimming" through the nettles with long sleeves for protection I noticed how they were rubbing against my shoulder. Healing green. Walking the fields is not like walking on pavement and it's very good for ankles. In the tall grass one is never sure what is underfoot. I was clumsy and off balance going. Coming back I attuned to legs and feet. I connected consciously and followed them to the ground finding new balance and harmony. Is this why I'm thinking about doing ji-gong? Will that help me with grounding?

At the next willow area I layed on the earth and soon the sun was peeking in from the East through the low branches. I greeted sun eye to eye. At that moment my head felt as if it was being held in sweet embrace of earth. It actually felt like two hands holding my head like a massage therapist would do. A precious moment of connection. I walked out later and laid in the open field looking up at white clouds. I love to wander.

I dragged the old blanket with debris behind me as I left. First with the right hand/arm/shoulder then with the left hand/arm/shoulder and then with both hands held pulling together at lower back. I had a short but steep embankment to climb up to the trail and I did so with that debris. Such good therapy at all levels! People on the trail probably thought I was a homeless person with wet jeans and shoes...and a new red tail hawk feather in my jacket zipper. I didn't care!

Sun radiates unconditionally. I wonder what point holds focus for sun. Is it a point in another galaxy or a parallel universe? Would there be holding points of focus for each planet in the solar system?

Honesty through Purification

I realize that telepathic relationship serves the needs of some people. In my book I will welcome those stories. This level of relationship served my needs until my emotional body asked for more. How many men can go there? How many men can give emotion equal quality time? And can the same question be asked of women? I think I'm talking about and asking for a new level of honesty...starting within myself. It's a new level of purification and we must go there.

Sex, Orgasm and Tantra

Well, I asked the question and have the answer this morning. The question was how do I write a book so the public will notice? What would draw attention? Would it be shamanic adventure, personal stories, nature, spiritual evolution or "fairy" tales?

This morning it's clearly coming through that I'll write a chapter about sex, orgasms (there are several types) and telepathic relationship. Is this tantra? I haven't done any research on this subject. I have had some good experiences...and bad. What is a bad sexual experience? When one is left cold and separate. What is a good sexual experience? When two are lifted as one to new heights. I guess that is Tantra.

I think it's time to talk more openly about telepathic relationships and that out-of-body hologrpahic terrain. I think more people go there, live there, than is known. I don't find it gratifying because it's not wholistic...it's out of body. I have plenty of spirit being relationships in other realms and don't seem to want one here in this realm. A physical relationship provides grounding where a spiritual out-of-body relationship cannot. Physical release of a grounded relationship and energetic release of a spiritual relationship are very different angles. Can both be experienced with a physical partner on a day-to-day and long term basis? I haven't had that experience yet. I congratulate anyone who has.

Light that I am seems to want to be focused and not split. I'm not sure such a relationship is possible in physical form for me. And it may be that I'm learning to accept that through detachment. It does bring up a lot of grief because that is how I was patterned: a female is not whole without a male. I am having to do a lot of cleansing of my lens to change that patterning. When a sense of lack comes up my mind is there to say, "Not true." It's lot of conscious work.

For me letting go of telepathic relationships provide space for something new in both physical and spiritual realms. Not having a man in my romantic view is a bit dis-orienting making me realize how long it's been since I didn't have a man in mind.

Those predators who travel in telepathic realms and prey on women will serve their karma sooner or later. A book that talks about this terrain is a wake up call to women who are doing spiritual work. It is a wake up call to women that there are men who use women -- especially those women who, as a child, did not have a healthy father relationship.

In my love-life the quality of each relationship has evolved over time. Each new relationship holds more spiritual substance than the one before. However, the spiritual/telepathic relationships can be bitter-sweet when the angles of emotion, thinking and sensing are not projected through one's physical body. Bitter-sweet lasts only so long...I am going for sweet...Olympic gold!

Medicine Wheel & Earth Diamond

The massage loosened a lot of toxins. I had a headache for days. This morning driving to work head and shoulders seemed disjointed. I remembered that the massage therapist had told me to breathe from my belly. I took some deep breaths. Though my right shoulder is still sore my head/neck/body seem to be connecting again. No doubt body is going through some sort of energy shift.

That triangle and diamond holds:

N,E,S,W directions

water, air, earth, fire forces

levels of consciousness

upper, middle and lower worlds

I celebrate this Medicine Wheel now set into motion through consciousness.

Tonight as I was walking along the river in the fresh air (Ahhh) I had the sensation of holding a lance or sword in my right hand and piercing it into the earth. "This ground is holy ground." Even through the dysfunction, wounds, dark shadow "This ground is holy ground."

N/S is a sword. Archangel Michael holds sword and according to Doreen Virtue is associated with cobalt Blue. Since Michael was the first spirit being to visit me many years ago I honor him here now.

The Woman's Dictionary of Symbols & Sacred Objects

Earth Diamond (Eye of Fire)

The rhomb or diamond was said to be the sign of the Virgin Earth, that is, Mother Earth at the beginning of creation.

To early Gnostic Christians, she was not a metaphor but a true spiritual personality, the cocreator of the universe along with another female spirit. Gnostic literature said Adam was not created by God but by "two virgins," the spirit Sophia and the Virgin Earth. The latter was also taken as another title of Eve.

Like other Goddess symbols, such as the circle, triangle, and yoni, the earth diamond has been designated "emblematic of the female sexual organ."

Another name for this symbol was the Eye of Fire, especially in Nordic tradition. This would naturally associate the symbol with the Goddess Hel, the underground Earth Mother whose name was later applied to the Christian idea of a vast torture chamber under the earth.

Hel was not originally "hellish," however, except perhaps that her fiery eye always saw the truth and mortal faults could not be concealed from her.

A golden diamond, sometimes marked by the cross, was the most common sign of the Earth Mother in the Orient, where she was the vast foundation and support of the holy mountain that upheld all the paradises of the gods.

Dawning Sacred Feminine; Projecting Sacred Masculine

Seers and crystal balls live in fairy tales. We are in a time/space of fairy tale. Magic is afoot.

I am grateful for chopra.com blog. It's a crystal ball for me. I go there, am attracted to a post and respond. The seeing that emerges is magical. It's more than the sum of the parts. It's more than a labyrinth. It's crystal making. Crystals have magical molecular structure and are made up of parts holding points and patterns in and for the whole.

Yesterday I wrote about a triangle in response to a blog post. It's more like the triangle spoke through me. I act as a conduit, a channel, for inspiration and information. Each part has this responsibility to different degrees which means varied colors and sounds. It's like a garden where every part is beautiful and holds a tone in cosmic orchestra.

The triangle shows me that it's two triangles. One an invert of the other -- mirror like. It looks like a diamond. Top point is upper world, middle line is middle earth, lower point is underworld. Top is head, middle (shoulders is the line in focus at this time) is body, and bottom is feet.

The horizontal line at shoulders reminds me of the brace of a kite. Bodies are like kites. This shoulder tension and the need for release is not just my body it's our collective body. Something is moving out and moving in. We do this healing release work together.

Is upper world superconsciousness and whole brain knowing?
Is middle world subconscious?
Is lower world unconscious?

If that's the case middle earth, our flesh bodies, have a lot of filtering work to do for the well being of the whole. We do that work with and through our ego. It is shadow filtering light.
Ego shadow is a lens for light.

As I read through my writings and drawings over the years I notice a pattern in the language of the sacred feminine. Image always comes first like a birthing or dawning of a new cycle of consciousness. A portal of light that brings the gift of an archetypal image. For example years ago I had drawn an arc with - and + at East and West points. It's message now added new meaning and dimension to a process that has been unfolding in my living and my consciousness for years. It's as if the image is the word and the word is made flesh. And it's as if the image is the skeleton and flesh is added. The image is the "vision" and living in the moment day to day is the action that fills in the vision. I'm hearing/sensing that this has to do with the way light moves or works.

If the sacred feminine is the dawning of light no wonder Her elimination in our world has caused massive disease and destruction. Sacred Masuline projects light increasing Her power. Together they work magic. Each one of us carries both qualities of light.

Blue Ray Dragon

I was at an event with Michael Meade a few years ago at a retreat center near Santa Cruz. It was a powerful gathering because it included his storytelling, mythology, drumming and singing. It also included rituals in nature, foot baths (what a gift!), dream work and a lot of verbal interraction. I love these wholistic opportunities to engage and generate spiritual substance as parts of a larger whole. I saw my first gnome driving through those Santa Cruz Mountains.

That Sunday massage loosened a lot of toxins. My right shoulder aches. I'm at the computer a lot now that I'm writing Language of the Sacred Feminine. At first I thought I wouldn't have enough material. But I've saved my writings and poetry for 25+ years and the chapters keep increasing. I switched the mouse to the left hand/arm to give my right a break. Maybe it's a significant shift between +/- energies in this body that I am.

At some point I suspect my focus will shift to the Sacred Masculine. I think the book, that I also call Blue Dragon Ray (shamanic angle), is part of that shift from inner feminine to outer masculine.

Love of Self

On the chopra Intent.Blog there has been talk about infidelity and opinions fly about the John Edwards story. I'm noticing a change in my field of relationships and don't think that I can engage romatically with a man who is involved with another woman. Why? Because a man who is involved with another woman carries her scent and I cannot cross these emotional lines. It would also create karma between me, him and her. A triangulation that I don't want to carry. What about unconditional love? I may be learning that this higher love is about my relationship with Self and not someone else. I have to be true to me...keeping myself in relationship balance.

Conspiracy Theory

On the chopra IntentBlog there was a conspiracy story. I have a conspiracy story.

Earth is the last planet in our solar system to have colors of nature. All the other planets' colors have been devoured. Now Earth is in process of being depleted of her natural colors. There is grey color and grey pavement everywhere. Humans are destroying Her life support energies and systems. Who is behind this conspiracy? It's not masculine and it's not feminine. It's another force to be revealed.

Soul Travelling

Life begins to feel like a totem pole with various levels of stories. This story is one level of reality but not the only one.

I saw on the news that scientists have a cloak that can make 3rd dimensional objects disappear. A Harry Potter novelty.

It made me think of sleep and dreaming. Don't we disappear when we dream? Our bodies are here but our soul is travelling in other dimensions?

My dream the other night was so vivid...it's still having an effect on me. I remember thinking in the dream that "I know this place". It was familiar...like home. I find that very comforting.

White Light Absorption

Someone told me recently that white light holds/absorbs all colors and that black is colorless.

Had a dream today (body wanted to sleep most all day -- I wonder where it travelled?) about a baby I was interracting with. Quite suddenly the baby tried to kick me in the face with a strong negative force. It became quite violent toward me. I wonder how many dark forces are hiding behind forms? White light detects them...maybe even draws them out of hiding.

What does that say about our world? To me it would say that we are in an incredible time of healing opportunity.

Embrace & Brace

Went to a River Festival and listened to a lot of music. Two final acts were popular country artists and both of them mentioned angels. Driving home I noticed a new vibe...stressless...as if I was floating along the freeway.

Dream: New vibration. Arms and legs are attuned X fashion -- receptive. I fly higher than ever. So high that a US satellite craft detects me and comes toward me. I am holding a vibrating white band outstretched with both hands. This band helps with flight and I dart quickly away.

I wake up in an open air house feeling sweet wind currents fill the room. When I open my eyes I see hanging baskets of white flowers all around me. I wonder who put them there as I was vibrating in flight. I start asking and learn that "Meagen" put them there as gifts of gratitude for something I had done. I have several dream encounters with different people.

In this "dream" time dimension (how many levels do we function in?) I watched my ex-lover work on a 12' totem pole. He was carving turtle the very first symbol. I enjoy watching him work. At one point we embraced and it felt soooo good. I asked aloud why my body needs this touching. And the answer was very clear, "It's grounding." I'm using logic in this pull to ground through body contact and the implications of such action. That's a healthy sign! Maybe body wants affection...not sex. Affection and nurturing that is missing in this realm due to too much red fire. Why are the other colors left out in relationships?

That white band that helped me fly reminds me of a brace on a kite, hang glider and airplane. When I skydived I had to hang by the wing strut. Maybe brace and strut are the same. How is "embrace" similar to "brace."

Brace defintion:

1. A device that holds or fastens two or more parts together or in place; a clamp.
2. A device, such as a supporting beam in a building or a connecting wire or rope, that steadies or holds something else erect.

The Word

I was impressed (not ego impressed but soul impressed) that the Olympics Opening Ceremony began with blank paper. It's very receptive -- Feminine.

I woke up thinking about this and the biblical verse came in: In the beiginning was the word and the word was with God/dess and the word was God/dess. (Without Feminine God is half true.)

What does "the word" mean -- when it includes Feminine?

Angel and Perseids

That angel voice and face in my garden last evening had a pattern of motion/expression. The "she is beautiful" came in from the back of my head -- behind me. The tones and face then enveloped my whole head and a face came into focus more in front.

Some family is going to a brother's hippy cabin near Mount Rainier to watch the meteor showers. I hope the sky is clear.

Google:

The next meteor shower is the Perseids on August 12, 2008. After the first-quarter moon sets, around 2 a.m., meteors should be more easily visible until dawn. You may see dozens of meteors per hour.

Name	Date of Peak	Moon Phase
Quadrantids	January 4, morning	Crescent, rises 4-5 a.m.
Lyrids	night of April 21/22	almost Full
Eta Aquarids	May 5, morning/evening	New Moon
Perseids	August 12, morning	Sets around 2 a.m.
Orionids	October 21, morning	Rises around 1 a.m.
Leonids	November 17, morning	Rises late evening
Geminids	December 13, evening	Full Moon

NOTES These are approximate times for the Lower 48 states; actual shower times can vary. Bright moonlight makes it difficult to see all but the brightest meteors.

What are meteor showers?

An increase in the number of meteors at a particular time of year is called a meteor shower.

Comets shed the debris that becomes most meteor showers. As comets orbit the Sun, they shed an icy, dusty debris stream along the comet's orbit. If Earth travels through this stream, we will see a meteor shower. Depending on where Earth and the stream meet, meteors appear to fall from a particular place in the sky, maybe within the neighborhood of a constellation.

Meteor showers are named by the constellation from which meteors appear to fall, a spot in the sky astronomers call the radiant. For instance, the radiant for the Leonid meteor shower is located in the constellation Leo. The Perseid meteor shower is so named because meteors appear to fall from a point in the constellation Perseus.

Fine Tuning

I've been noticing my negative thought patterns. At one time I noticed a beam associated with one of these thoughts. Tonight I was in my garden talking with a woman who tends to the horses. I started to see her body size and think "chubby" when a soft tone in both color and sound said, "She's beautiful" and "Trish, so are you." As this was heard I saw a face come into soft focus. Was this divine intervention or what? One sees the world inside out and it's time to reflect on how and what one sees.

I have been more self-conscious about my body lately and noticing other women's bodies. It's as if old tapes are playing that negative self-image tune from childhood. I work to erase them consciously with forgiveness and love....and with the help of an angel. These thoughts are very deep and unconscious...they play without notice. Until it's time to notice and work to change the tune.

What would life be like without the negative patterns? I would be even more of a misfit. Now that's an interesting thought pattern. Am I afraid of being too Light? Am I afraid of my own Light? Am I more comfortable in shadow? What would it be like to clean up my act even more? I feel hesitant...change is a lot of work but there is no going backward.

Gi-gong

Spontaneous emission includes flesh body parts through sexual expression...a range more vast than human egos living out of lower chakras can imagine.

Memories came in regarding my ex-lover relationship. A lot didn't work so why would I enter that territory again? Since I opened the door I'm now going to ask him: Would he be willing to talk about what didn't work? Would he consider affection before sexual fire? Looks like fire without consciousness is not going to work for me.

My mouth and hands are instruments of spontaneous emission. They passionately express emotion. I know light beams emit from hands...do they also emit from mouth? Language, then, is a grounding of charged energy as is kissing.

I'm thinking about Gi-gong exercises and may start to include that in my routine. Body needs new ways to release energy. S/He is moving forward in consciousness not backward. Old tapes are identified and reprogrammed...no, old tapes are discarded as new ones fill in. Maybe it's like not filling old wine bottles with new wine. The container also has to be new.

Garden Body

I started to write in my book project today and the first sentence held new reverberation:
The Sacred Feminine speaks through spontaneous emission rising from the depth and core of unconscious terrain.

My ex-lover stopped by the other day and since I wasn't home he weeded a bit in the garden. I invited him back since it's been awhile since we've seen each other. A couple of months ago when I was with him my body was wanting to make some sensexual overtures but logic held her back. Now, to my surprise, body is again wanting that intimate connection. When I asked him what my physcial response was about he suggested that it was the "season". Perhaps it's true. Much of my garden is ripening and ready for harvest. Maybe my own earth garden is also.

However, the relationship didn't work before so why would I want to dive back in? The answer is clear: to learn more about relationship. Goddess is very fickle however and I may not feel the same way the next time I'm with him. I'm suggesting to him that we keep the temperature cool for a time rather than starting with fire as before. That we build friendship. Before I did the role playing of keeping house and it didn't work. I am too independent to care take a man like my mother did. And he is too much of a free spirit to be caged in. So, how does relationship work? How can two people have independence and yet enjoy intimacy?

All I know is that I'd like a man around once in awhile. I wonder what that means and how that can work between a male and a female?

Spontaneous Emission...homework

Wikipedia:

• absorption (optics)
• stimulated emission
• photonic crystal
• laser science
• emission spectrum
• spectral line
• Atomic spectral line
• Vacuum Rabi oscillation
• Jaynes-Cummings model

Spontaneous Emission

It's so interesting how someone else's language can add an angle that adds to my conscious awareness. This is the dynamic of crystal community.

It's light begetting light. It's white blood cells connecting with white blood cells. What else is it? I cannot know without other angles of seeing. I cannot know it without other angles of hearing. I cannot know it without other angels of Being. Human minds and hearts are designed to be connected.



Spontaneous emission is the process by which a light source such as an atom, molecule, nanocrystal or nucleus in an excited state undergoes a transition to the ground state and emits a photon. Spontaneous emission of light or luminescence is a fundamental process that plays an essential role in many phenomena in nature and forms the basis of many applications, such as fluorescent tubes, television screens, plasma display panels, lasers and light emitting diodes.

Earth Dance

Back home after camping with family -- a first for 10 of us and we all survived! My emotional body didn't want to leave my campsite...the fir trees smelled so good and the towhees (?) entertaining as they cycled through enjoying the mountain ash berries of red. And that bird high up with that one note song I often hear in the woods....a mystery bird. It was a creative space as I got up "early" -- 6:30 AM is not early for me but family thought otherwise -- and wrote more about my sacred feminine journey. The outline now in place to be filled in. My granddaughter joined me briefly at that early hour and suggested that if I went camping more I would get more information. Yes...I like the way she thinks!

Reading Bill Plotkin's Soulcraft I am so happy to see a male talking about the language of the sacred feminine.

Another day of vacation and I'm not sure what my identity is today. Everything feels a bit blurry. From a structured environment that revolved around meals and entertainment plans of the whole I now have to set my sails for me. I listen for wind. I listen to my body for direction. My garden awaits...my bike...my book... Is it okay to do nothing? To be still? How about stillness in action...I continue to learn those instructions.

Serpentine dance of dark and light weave through so many parts within oneself and with others. There are so many diverse relationships and ways to relate as a part of the whole and as a whole amidst the parts. So many tangles and twists in ebb and flow resisting, responding, reacting, deflecting, absorbing, reflecting, charging, dissipating, re-charging, radiating. How can anything stagnate in this dance of diversity? It always goes back to response...angle of response. If angles carry light matter evolves with energy exponentially.

Computer Desktop Encyclopedia: exponential growth

Extremely fast growth. On a chart, the line curves up rather than being straight. Contrast with linear.