Shutter Lens

Open and close remind me (there's "memory" coming into the picture) of the shutter lens I referred to earlier. What that was is a fog right now. I am so not linear and the dots don't always hold connection. My brain activity is very fluid and forward in motion.

Definition of: shutter

(1) An opaque window that is moved in one direction to let light in and in another to close off the light. In fixed-lens cameras, one shutter often suffices for aperture and speed. In most single lens reflex (SLR) cameras, the camera has a built-in shutter that pops up to let light in and drops down after a certain amount of time, while each lens contains its own diaphragm shutter that acts like an iris to let light pass (aperture setting). See shutter speed, aperture and shutter lag.

Design #3

I keep seeing an image of a sea creature (jelly fish I think) that moves through water by expansion and contraction. It's circular and the open close rhythm propels it through space. This open/close rhythm is part of the energy/matter design where life thrives.

I also see Mother Earth with circular valves pulsating substance to and from heaven/earth. My body is the same. What are these chords/valves? What is the substance? Seems there are downloads of energy so that matter can absorb/digest the frequencies and there are uploads to balance it out.

No doubt the endocrine glands and chakras hold these rhythms and this design. Mother Earth would have these glands and chakras as well, no?

I use the term "brain/body" where others use the term "mind/body". For me the two are different.

More Drama = More Change

I said that negative energy does not help Transition.
She said that I have attacked her twice and that she might leave the group.

Oops! I did it again! I created division in a relationship.

She was frustrated with me. I was frustrated with her. I asked for a solution: If I stopped talking about "energy" and she stopped talking about the lack of people in our TW group perhaps we would not push each other's buttons. She was okay with that in word. Her body language told me differently.

It annoys me when people see and thus speak about what is wrong rather than what is right -- that glass half empty instead of half full. The words and the person carry a toxic energetic cloud that has an effect and I care too much about the larger whole to not speak up.

Moving Rhythms

Ebb / Flow
Inhale / Exhale
Give / Receive
Engage / Let go
Push / Pull
Open / Close
Action / Stillness

Rhythms of energy and matter in motion of e-motion
Rhythms moving mass through space
Rhythms singing balance through circles and spirals
Rhythms creating change

Orbs of matter dance the rhythm of their own heart/drum beat
This collective song sings our path through space
May it be a path of Grace through darkness into dawn of a new age

The Gifts of Imperfection

I saw this woman on TV weeks ago and related to her message:

The Gifts of Imperfection
by Dr. Brene Brown


Perfection is an addiction; it takes courage to be imperfect

It takes courage to set boundaries

I am enough

Live and love with one’s whole heart

Vulnerability is at the core of fear and shame; also the birthplace of love, joy and belonging

Shutting down vulnerability shuts down gates to joy and happiness

Authenticity is the ability to be vulnerable

Engage with the world from a place of worthiness

Own your story; tell it with all your heart

Net worth is self worth

Worthiness has no prerequisites

Be joyful, present, grateful

Choose less work and more time to do nothing and be out doors

Hardwired to experience love and belonging when we are not sick, broken and suffering

Love is not something we give or get

Love is nurtured between people when showing most vulnerable self

Belonging is not fitting in; it’s in our DNA

Innate human need to be part of something larger than oneself

Sense of belonging = sense of self worth

RJ Stewart

Is the Easter branching what RJ Stewart calls a Faery Line? The following is from his website rjstewart.org. It is music for my Soul. Thanks RJ!


When I was traveling in Ireland some years ago, visiting ancient sites, one such site was in the back yard of a farmhouse. The woman of the house opened the door: She had a baby upon her hip, and inside the lounge I could see a television, loudly on, and a refrigerator, and a computer. After asking her permission to go through the yard, she said, “Of course you can go through…but be careful. A mighty king is buried there, and anyone who disturbs him loses the use of their arms and legs.” So here was this modern young woman directly, and seriously, telling me something that had been handed down for thousands of years… for the site was a megalithic chamber tomb. But more than this telling, was the inherent idea that to interfere with the land at a place of power is to ask for trouble. Needless to say, I did not disturb the site in any way.

Another modern story that I had from several independent sources was of the man somewhere in Ireland, in a place not to be named, who broke a faery line when he extended his new house. Faery lines are found in many Celtic countries (they are not to be confused with the fashionable idea of ley lines, for they are something different, and unique to the faery tradition). In some old communities the lines are marked by small pathways that start suddenly and finish nowhere, or by curves in the roads, or strange breaks in boundary fences and walls. This poor man had been warned that a faery line ran by the back of his new house, but he extended the building anyway. His first son died in an accident, then his second son fell ill and died. Next his third son fell ill, and then he tore down the extension of the house… and the third son recovered.

Now, is this modern story an urban legend? It was relayed to me as contemporary and true. What does it tell us? That if you interfere with faery lines of power, your house and family can become imbalanced and ill, even unto death. So faery tradition is about vitality, the health of the land and the human relationship to that health. Could any subject be more apt and urgent for our polluted corrupt and disease infested times?

What does the faery tradition teach us?

The faery tradition is about spiritual forces, natural forces, embodied as beings that live in the land. If we want to be whole and healthy, we should know more about them, have a better relationship with them. And this is exactly what the old Irish faery tradition us: how to relate to these beings.

My thesis is that far from seeing the stories and practices of faery tradition as quaint old curiosities, that we should look deeper, and learn what the ancestors have to teach us: that we need to relate to the land, the continents, the oceans, the world, in a better and more wholesome way.

The Irish and Celtic faery tradition teaches us that we have spiritual cousins in the land, and that the health of the land depends on our good relationship with them. This is why in some places the faeries are called the Good Neighbors… we live right next to them, if we but knew it.

Many of the so-called superstitions of faery tradition can be seen in a different light once we appreciate that it is a tradition of relationship to the land and sea. For example, we all know that old country people used to, and still do, make offerings. These offerings are food and drink, sometimes brightly colored items or cloths, left at the back door, or at an ancient spring, or at stones, or even at the shrine of a saint. Such things are left for the people of the Sidh, the faeries, the Good Neighbors. They are usually interpreted as “acts of faith” at best, or “acts of ignorance” at worst, superstitious propitiation to avert bad luck.

Let us think about the offerings a different way: the food and drink originally came out of the land (rather than from MacDonald’s or Pepsi…honestly, it’s true, though hard to believe). Thus the offerings were emblematic of giving back: after the hard work of harvest, baking, brewing, something was given back. Even as a simple talisman this is potent, for it is a sign of acknowledgement and respect…we are not greedy, we give back to the land that has given us so much. But there is more.

The faeries are said to absorb the essence, the vitality, of the food and drink. The remaining substance must later be buried, and never given to a human or animal. This is an interesting idea, is it not? That the food and drink from the land have vital forces within them, that human hands can transform the raw food plants into food and drink, and that the transformed vitality can be offered back, sharing it with the spirits of the land. Even as a poetic or psychological practice, there is something deeply appropriate and satisfying in all of this.

In his book, The Spell of the Sensuous, American author David Abrams describes how he saw women make rice offerings in Indonesia, given “to the spirits” but subsequently carried off by ants. Then he tells us that the ants never came into the open houses, and wonders if this traditional practice of offerings to spirits is also a mystery of relating to the insect world. Is his experience in Indonesia and his interpretation of what he saw, based on rationalization, or does it mask a deeper truth, about how humans must interact with the other orders of life to live within the land?

Of course Europeans or Americans just spray chemicals…then we wonder why there are plagues of insects upon us. How does this relate to Irish and Celtic faery tradition? Well, the faery realm is the realm of exchange. As I have heard it aptly described, it is the realm of compost. It is where we give back, share, and exchange. Indeed, this simple but far-reaching truth is found in the faery and land- spirit traditions worldwide. The Indonesian with her rice grains, the woman of Connemara with her sweet baked cakes. They are at one in this fine knowledge: give back, share, and come into harmony with your own land.

On the subject of compost, do you remember the story of the man from county Clare who went into a faery hill, and tricked the occupants out of their pot of gold? When he got home, it was full of leaves and earth. Compost is the gold of the faery realm…but we do not value it sufficiently. So our surface world is dying of chemical toxicity, while the vast riches of our faery cousins are just beneath our feet…. the vast healing riches that we have rejected in pursuit of domination and greed.

Easter Lens

Easter morning image shoots upward toward me from inner and outer space -- holographically. I catch it but cannot hold it. It moves at the speed of light and I wonder about my own "shutter lens" (words that came through) and how I can learn to adjust. Holograms that I've seen in movies/TV have been portrayed on an E/W plane. This image was vertical N/S branching out E/W. The colors were bright green and pink. My first thought was the Tree of Life in reverse. I know RJ Stewart whom I met at the Faery Congress has talked about this and I have notes somewhere.

What is four dimensional seeing and Being?



four·-dimensional (fôr′də men′s̸hə nəl)

adjective

of or in four dimensions, esp. in relativity theory where four coordinates are used to record the space location and time of occurrence of each event
four-di·men·sion·al (fôrˌdĭ-mĕnˈshə-nəl, fōrˌ-)

adjective
Specified by or exhibiting four dimensions, such as the three spatial dimensions and single temporal dimension of relativity theory.

Kirtan with Yogananda

I received an invitation from musicians Narayan and Janet to attend their Kirtan and Participatory Music Experience at Woodinville Unity. I felt like attending and intended to network. I took brochures and flyers for Transition Rocks concert.

The kirtan turned out to be chanting and Yogananda’s book Cosmic Chants was featured. Narayan and Janet lived in an Ananda house and are very devoted to this path. They will have another concert the end of May at Lynnwood Unity. It’s been years since I’ve been to Unity Church where I began my spiritual journey so many years ago.

At one point in the music experience I felt a fluttering in my head and then a shift of vibration. Yogananda came into my awareness and I felt his surrounding presence (again). I wanted to offer him a gift so my hands came together with palms upright. I waited for something to fill in my palms. Nothing. I waited some more. Nothing. Then a white pearl appears….and then…it unfolds into a lotus. I lift it up to this spirit Being. Yogananda’s presense is strong in vibration and I experience his uplifting energy all around my head.

I was then transported to the Yogananda center and park in Southern California where I spent some time a couple of years ago when my unemployment journey began (next month it will end). I remembered the plots of trees and plants. The ocean also came back around in memory.

I had forgotten about this relationship with Yogananda Now I wonder what to do with this connection. Perhaps I’ll attend one of their meditations in Bothell. This was an unexpected Earth Day activity.

Design #2 = Spiral Dance

I wanted to binge on comfort foods mid-week. It brought up memories of past moments when I did so. This has been a cyclic pattern since childhood. I didn’t go there in the same way but I did notice that I was eating too many refined carbs again. This pattern has felt like going over the edge and once I did the binging I was back on track. I’ve never understood these cravings and this cycle.

The next day I was drawn to the book Fractal Time so I read a few pages and put it down. It pulled me back again like a magnet. Why the pull? I then read that the earth’s position in the heavens relates to our own self-realization and that the closer we are to our galaxy’s core the more enlightened we are. Earth is currently in the furthest reach of an orbit and thus the dark before the dawn taking us into 2012. (Thanks Gregg Braden!)

Is this pattern something my body goes through regularly? Is it called bio-rhythms? Is this why I go into a dark phase and after going through it find myself in a new place? Does everyone go through this revolution that is more than moody weather patterns?

This new awareness of Earth in motion and her place in space helps me see my own pattern with more awareness. This makes me grateful for logical information.

Are we not all moving in the same rhythm and pattern of spiral dance as the turns happen in the N/S/EW/W edges so that curvature is created. I’ve never thought of my “depression” (word just came through so I use it) and binges as edge points. But that has changed….like everything in motion of emotion.

Whole Design

Some orbs come into one’s space with fire and leave one cold to come back around sooner or later.

Other orbs come into one’s space and stay filling seasons and cycles with color hues and temperatures of flowing emotions and thoughts.

These relationship patterns are part of a large design. They fall into place naturally as each part honors what’s moving at the core of their heart/mind.

The shifts and changes reach for balance and harmony. No regrets, no resentments, no judgement in the flow of unfolding design.

Love holds the whole design and humans find their part in it sooner or later.

Love In Action

I noticed my peace of mind changing from calm to agitated in two separate circumstances regarding something someone said and did. I caught the shift immediately and pulled in the reins. I changed the emotional and mental tape and behavior pattern from going anywhere.

Yesterday at the Tulip Festival with a friend I was in a quiet mood lacking outgoing fire which feels like enthusiasm. I was contemplative. All day there was an old tape running that has roots in childhood and probably in the womb from my mom’s patterns. I was self-critical: bad haircut, mousey hair color now that it’s natural, sagging this, sagging that. This self-consciousness is not Self-consciousness. As we were about to leave the gift shop I made face to face contact with a woman who works there. She immediately told me how pretty my hair was; that she had seen me earlier from a distance and thought that she’d like to look like me one day. The woman standing by her also commented about my hair color. They were both so genuine and clear. I was very grateful and told them so and that their compliments were especially kind being expressed woman to woman. Was this instant karma? Did this positive feedback change my old tape? No. I stayed in my funk until this morning when I awoke and reviewed my recent activities and their teachings. It became clear that it’s easier for me to reign in negative patterns about other people but not as easy when it comes to myself. Now I get to do my homework! It doesn’t get any closer than this inner work that revolves around love of self.

In Spontaneous Fulfillment of Desire Deepak talks about soul as the all-knowing observer. I got the sense that soul is that collective of unconscious, sub-conscious and conscious knowing. I appreciate this new observation that words provide. There are other words that I am learning such as nonlocal and virtual. At one point I wondered at all this wisdom through words and language. What is the purpose of it all? In our self-discovering and self-actualizing journey we reach a point when self-healing expands to planetary healing. It’s a natural shift of gears from inner to outer; spiritual to physical; nonlocal to quantum (another new word). For me this shift was not a quantum leap but an evolving process. Perhaps when enough of us have made this shift that quantum leap will manifest in the whole. This would be reaching the “critical mass” that Deepak refers to.

My work in the world has to do with healing our soil, water, air and to change the corrupt systems that produce and sustain toxicity. We start at the grassroots level: more chickens and worm bins, farmers markets, organic produce in mainstream grocery stores, local currency, etc. We unify around these values and support systems that are sustainable. As each one listens to their hearts they find their own issues and the pathways that move them to action.

Bee Medicine

The film Vanishing of the Bees is a must see! Transition Woodinville hosted the film last night and some of us are inspired to write letters to the editor. Beekeepers worldwide are experiencing Colony Collapse Disorder. In France the beekeepers united, hired a lawyer and the political official banned pesticides! Transition Woodnivlle’s logo is Bee Resilient and our intention is to assist the bee community.

I was sick at my stomach when I saw how science is manipulating bees and how large bee farmers exploit their bee colonies. We kill bees through monocrops, chemical use especially systemic ones, and manipulating Nature in the name of Science. We save bees through small gardens and farms, organic methods and working with/respecting Nature.

Once again I am reminded of a force that is anti-Nature pulling us toward mechanization and technology; a force pulling us off balance. We must speak out and act out. How many have done the inner healing work to do this outer healing work in the world?

It's interesting that we had to move through some toxic territory to get to this place of saving the bees. There is something very mystical about bees. We continue to listen to the sound of their wings.

Coincidence

In Spontaneous Fulfillment of Desire Deepak Chopra speaks my language. In the introduction I read the words “out of the blue” and knew that I was on the right track. Gregg Braden talks about “check points” in cycles of time. Words are also check points that remind me of tracking and songlines one point leading to the next. These points hold electromagnetism: fire generating sound and form: Life.

Tracking words is like tracking an animal. There are subtle energetic tracks underneath the surface and beyond the physical eye. Living in the “quantum” field one can read and live by these signs. Perhaps this is the field I refer to as negative space.

On blogs and Facebook Deepak asks good questions that stimulate my brain body to reply. I’m always delighted by what moves through my unconscious, subconscious and conscious wheels in spontaneous response. I’m delighted because it’s a letting spirit move process and I get to see what spirit has to say. (Is spirit the field I refer to as negative space? How is spirit different from quantum?) The outer questions that are asked and the answers that blossom help me to know myself. It’s like a two way mirror. Not sure what that means but that is the sense of image and the words coming through. I’m also getting that this mirroring is feedback looping. So in this moment an inner communication of looping is occurring via images and psychic sensing. I report it to track it/ground it.

Other questions and conversations are bumpy and bring different opportunities and lessons. All contact is an exchange through energy (how is energy different from quantum and negative space?) and matter. All communication takes us forward into another lesson about Truth, Love and Life which means about oneself. We can go round and round not learning or expressing anything new or we can transcend the old and fly! Sooner or later each part becomes enlightened in the larger whole thanks to a loving universe.

I see my questions about words and language. It’s not really my style to comprehend in this way. I have to “know” from within in order for something to “stick.” Frog medicine again! Is not “stickiness” also electromagnetic? What do mirrors have to do with this process? Enough questions...for now! All the questions feel like I've awakened a sleeping giant. Now what does that mean??

Wavelength Seeing/Hearing

Listening to Love for the People - 1000 Drums on You Tube just now I remembered that as I was falling asleep this morning a map image was in front of me. As soon as I became conscious of it's black and white patterns of language it vanished. I consciously worked to bring it back but I was out of that wavelength. Perhaps I can learn to see in this way??? Reminds of me of "non-local" reality.

The song from the Puyallup Tribe continues to sing me...I hear it move through me.

Mental Stimulation

Woke up 3:30 am with thinking brain engaged / working.

“Cease fire” has to do with a lack of negativity in thought, word and action. Old negativity is no longer dominant and in focus.

There is a layer/veil associated with dark negativity that lets Light through. The woman I was “in battle” with emailed asking why I was constantly taking jabs at her. Those jabs were my responses to her rudeness, disrespect and inappropriate behavior. I was persistent. She has changed in spite of her complaints and is more positive. I have also changed. Another man I have stood up to is also more positive and even happy. It’s as if there was a burn out of the old and a burn into new territory. Dark negativity is fertile ground when Truth of Love is sown.

“…and the time between each pause…” is how Gregg Braden talks about reading codes of fireflies in Fractal Time. This rang a bell with me. Is this not negative space? Scientists dissect matter and energy but have they studied negative space? I don’t think they can with linear mind that focuses on parts. Negative space is whole and requires a different angle of brainwave in order to see and hear its Nature. I'mnot sure how anti-matter fits into the picture. Would have to research and that takes a lot of effort for me.

I am aware that my right brain intelligence knows all at once through “spontaneous combustion.” I am also aware that another part of my intelligence, my left brain, knows through sequential time. I observe this through my blog’s communication / language. A word pops up and in time another word will support the previous word one building upon the other (the time between certain words). This process also happens with thought threads. For some reason this creative building block process reminds me of genes. I watch and listen for words via language patterns in a communication system. I also act by identifying and expressing those words thus a feminine/masculine feedback loop in motion.

I seem to be thinking more and know I am not alone in this process of new brain activity. I can use that word “thinking” now knowing that it includes emotion. I kept the two apart until now. We (many orbs in space/time) are engaged in new brain body that is pulsating with new intelligence of Life. This is very stimulating to the whole brain body.

Thanks to Gregg Braden for food for thought. Soon I will read Spontaneous Fulfillment of Desire by Deepak Chopra. I love all this mental stimulation because it's now holistic! And, like magic, it arrives in the season of Spring...that fractal time turning of cycles/circles. I fill up with gratitude when I witness these seasons and my part/our part in their expression.

Fire vs Stagnation

The fiery entanglements that were moving in some relationships have lifted. It feels like a cease fire. Something in my body is not interested in engaging with fire. Not sure if it will come around again. If it does it will not be the same because we have all learned something new about relationship and relating face to face in alignment. Did we push through old wiring of stagnant patterns and create something new?

The line with central fire rn recent drum journey reminded me of spine and the nerves that are associated. My nerves feel more calm. Something has changed for now. Only time will tell what the larger picture is. As a cell and spark in quantum land and sea I know from within and in my environment. Change moves in one whole reverberating field.

I awoke to image of web/matrix with dark positive space and light negative space. The dark lines were sticky reminding me of Frog medicine in my recent drum journey. New relationship opens between these two fields.

The spaceyness in my head/brain has lifted and I feel more like my energetic self. I am aware that sometimes this pressure has to do with orbs that I am connected to. Just as we hold each other lightly in space so do we hold each other through tension and distress. And together we move through the darkness that leads to the dawn as Gregg Braden speaks of in Fractal Time. Fire moves us through.

Out of the Blue

Sometimes I think about Cinderella as I do "grunt" work at the farm. My identity is not external and I enjoy the peace of a simple life and accept where life lands me moment by moment.

From out of the blue Life has given me a beautiful flower. It sprung up from the underground already in full bloom...and I had no conscious idea of its unfoldment. When I look at the flower face to face I feel new emotion of loving affection. How does one "calculate" such spontaneous generation? One doesn't because it's magical.

Magic happens through negative space that is not subject to time/space rationale.

I'm dusting off my suitcase and taking a trip. It will be fun, relaxing and very spiritual. ...out of the blue magic.

Inspiration

As I read Fractal Time by Gregg Braden I hear his voice which has a nice effect. The book is laid out in bite size parts that are easy to digest.

Being right-brained oriented I generate my own insight from the information. I can do this because I have not studied or been trained. My brain body is open, receptive rather than filled in. Yes, I am very simple. I don’t suggest that everyone be this way. I do suggest that “scholars” include this angle of intelligence that knows through “spontaneous combustion” rather than linear and logical steps.

The right brain/body experience needs to be integrated rather than ignored/forgotten. This feminine way of being/knowing is not oriented to the past. It’s generative in Nature, it’s new. All things are NEW as I am NEW. Circles and cycles of time take us into new consciousness through living matter that is porous in Light.

The premise of the book is that the future is based on the past and moves in cycles of time. Is this not karma? And is not karma a very personal experience? Are we bound by karma? I always look at my own experience: I released a karmic cycle when I left a dead-end relationship. I released karma when I chose a spiritual path rather than a dark pattern of addiction. I continue to release karmic chains when I choose foods that are healthy and generative.

There are laws in motion beyond cycles of karma. We witness these laws because we express them/are immersed in them. Left and Right brain orientations hold one another lightly as we learn to communicate and understand our differences. We are not threatened by these differences. We relate in Love.

I had a new experience the other day that rippled softly and sweetly around me and through my core. It had to do with Transition emails and that someone cared enough to include me through the whole communication process. I saw that my presence was important to this person. Why did this have such an effect on me? Because I have been an outsider and this newness brings with it a breath of fresh air that lifts me. It feels new and good to be part of a larger body / community / family.

I look forward to reading more of Fractal Time and seeing what is generated through my orientation. This is the value of feedback loops...we learn from one another....inspired!

Pure Potentiality

Picked up Fractal Time and read the back cover. Twice now today I've heard reference to the "past" being a significant player in what moves us into the future. I'm not getting that. I am getting the following that suggests a transcendent force beyond time. Would it not be what turns time? A central fire force? If we are open and receptive to this light beam we move and evolve.


The Law of Pure Potentiality

How can we apply the Law of Pure Potentiality, the field of all possibilities, to our lives? If you want to enjoy the benefits of the field of pure potentiality, if you want to make full use of the creativity which is inherent in pure consciousness, then you have to have access to it. One way to access the field is through the daily practice of silence, meditation, and non-judgment. Spending time in nature will also give you access to the qualities inherent in the field: infinite creativity, freedom, and bliss.

Adapted from The Seven Spiritual Laws of Success, by Deepak Chopra (New World Library, 1994).

Brain Body Effects

My brain/head feels different. Reminds me of my kundalini experience years ago and how it was difficult to function in this world. I simply don't have the energy to do a lot of tasks. I feel pressure...spacey. Dis-engaged. I want to BE more still and quiet. I didn't feel like making phone calls this morning but needed to and it did help energize me. When will I be normal again? A new normal?

Maybe it's the detox effects from my new way of eating. The homeopathic enzyme remedy from my nutritionist allows me to have bread and sweets once in awhile. I appreciate this freedom. Often I am not even hungry for sweets! So, I'm sure my whole brain body is feeling this effect.

Heard Shirley MacLean on Oprah last night. She owns 8,000 acres in New Mexico and has chickens, garden, sees UFOs, advocates for meditation to be taught in school, etc. I like this woman!! Her new book I'm Over That should be interesting. I'm about to read Fractal Time by Gregg Braden...as soon as it is delivered.n Which reminds me. When I was drumming with my fingers I thought of the yarn paintings by the Huichol people and how I'd like to paint my shamanic drumming images. Guess I can paint an image on my drum. Shirley MacLean talked about the power of crystals and how they are abundant in Peru.

New Heaven New Earth

Saturday:

Woke up to information about yesterday’s dream. The "spores" now magnetic “pilings” and the area on body was upper chest between heart and throat chakras.

My brain is not linear and it is often a challenge to engage in this linear realm. During the dream I was aware of a place in brain that was void of fire like hitting a blank wall. I am aware of that void in waking state as well. My brain prefers to focus on feelings that run underneath words and actions and listen and watch for non-linear signals. My whole body prefers to do manual “labor” than sitting in an office or do linear work at the computer. This is opposite of today’s "civilized" world. My brain is shaped in shamanic pathways. This simple way of Being is mystical and magical in circulatory patterns that loop.

Modern technology takes us on pathways away from Shamanism. Green Nature and new brain is our future. Old left and right brain are pulling on each other clashing for territory. Humans have a role to play in the outcome. We determine the future.

Shamanism is structured into linear teachings. Do this…don’t do that. I hear the purpose is to keep the student safe. It’s important that one trust one’s inner pathways through listening and watching rather than following the rules that someone external set up. Fear controls through institutions of all shapes and sizes. Peace prevails inside out. Groundswelling change will continue to happen on Earth and in humans. Imagine the music and colors when humans listen within and dance this music together.

Open heart, open mind, swallow, digest and express/act. Living in fear is not shamanic. We live in a loving universe. That is our message through our living. This focus dissolves the demonic attachments that have us living illusions built on fear rather than joy. Open heart, open mind in a loving universe that lifts us up rather than holds us down.

Drumming window held no images. Drum sounds massaged body that swayed in the stillness of cycle complete for now. No rules…just flow. Go forth and “teach” flow because one is consumed by it / in it. Brain is now feeling different enshrouded in stillness that pervaded through Native Ceremony at the Garden and dancing at pow wow. Usual busy mind with self-criticism and outer analysis shuts down. Very NEW!

Frog and Pegasus Medicine

5:48 Bird song. Fingers want to drum rather than stick. Sounds like rain drops. I play child like. Shamanic practice is creative filled in and out with imagination and no external technology. Frog medicine and Pegasus. I need not share everything in the open.

Dream 8:00 AM
I leave my mate to go to a social event. I think he is behind me. I arrive and he does not. I try to locate him. I ask for phones but don't know how to use them. I can't remember the phone number. Stress. Then I remember the number and a creepy guy offers his phone. We are side by side; face to face. He has put something under my shirt at neck area. I frantically start pulling out dark spore-like substance from my shirt. He did not trick me. I cover him with green plant material. He disentegrates. Reminds me of my helplessness without left brain and the unprotectedness of this state.

Mt. Rainier Quaking

My brother's girlfriend reported this on Facebook. They live is Ashford near Packwood. The elemental forces are talking and moving!



Small quake reported near Mount Rainier

The Associated Press

Related

SEATTLE —
A magnitude 3.4 earthquake occurred at 10:45 a.m. Wednesday near Mount Rainier, 17 miles east of Ashford.

The Pacific Northwest Seismic Network reports a dozen people reported light shaking, mostly in the Packwood area.

Trickery

My computer has been acting up at the library. I thought it was secure but I suspect Tracker's toying antics. Same old tricks. How does he know I'm at the library? I suspect a tracking device on my car as if I'm one of his wolves. No person or animal likes to have this imposition and invasion in their personal space.

I say to Tracker: Bring it on. Face to Face. My fire and your Trickery.

Red Ray Dragon

The shamanic drumming this morning reminds me of my shamanic week at Esalen in Big Sur, California. There were very large forces there ready and waiting to come through. I was, and am, happy to facilitate this movement and communication.

Which drum to use? I choose the one I made years ago in a class called Birthing A Drum.

6:00 AM
Morning with sweet robin song
I close eyes and start to drum. I immediately see a N/S solid line. I wonder at it listening, holding. A snap shot came up of Tracker from years ago at an Earth Day event with drumming. Someone had made a critical/negative comment and I observed Tracker's insecurity, vulnerability. I observed a weak spot. This information was and is a window into his distorted behavior patterns. Fear creates insecurity; insecurity creates over-compensation; over-compensation creates distorted behavior patterns. These negative loops are strong and binding. Knowing the root cause does not excuse the behavior. Knowing calls for responsibility.

I drum....solid line becomes separate bricks/parts and softens with squiggly motion. I am reminded of snake's skin from the garden now on my book shelf near me. Serpent snake that gets bad rap because her/his sacred way was taken and forgotten. Bees come in. Both good medicine for Shamanic Pathways. Both needing human intervention.

Drumming now very intense, loud. Line is porous. Substance moves through E/W & W/E. Bird chorus re-sounding.

6:20 AM
I think about upcoming job at small farm and that an "agreement" needs to be written. I take charge of busy mind and focus on drumming intent. Serpent appeared N/S in stature. I go down her/his open mouth that faces heaven. I stop at belly/center. Fire in belly. I stay letting fire mold me inside and out. I am diamond crystal. Serpent has big smile. I feel the emotion. "Is this the end of the drumming?" I put out into the universe. No. Serpent wraps around central fire as a Mother/Father holds a baby/child.

6:32 AM
Drumming. With serpent we fly gathering/scooping continents, nations, countries, counties, cities inside belly. I notice the top of my head is vibrating with intense pressure. I notice musical quality to drumming as hand is moving intensely in N/S line. Serpent flies over land mass emitting substance. What is the substance I ask and look closer. Fire. Serpent is breathing Fire. Safe fire when it flows free through substance. Red Ray Dragon to complement Blue Ray Dragon many months before. I notice the N/S song of reverberting, dancing drum. I move hand creating E/W drumming and sound.

Esalen comes in with cat rock at cliff/beach and cat photograph I bought there and near me. I see Esalen is not underwater. I see Esalen with more land. I think of the West Coast of USA. It is like this N/S line. We hold this line. Drumming ends.




8:00 AM I turn on CNN. Japan had an earthquake at midnight. The weather anchor is showing the island with line along the East coast and quake in center. It looks just like my N/S serpent with fire in the belly. I see that there is communication and movement between the West coast of the USA and the East coast of Japan.

Call to Drum

April 6, 7, 8, 9 6 AM shamanic drumming for alignment and purification
Letting fire burn; water cleanse; air lift; earth ground

I awoke to a whole “picture” of information. I’m not certain where this information came from. Today it didn’t feel like it came from my own personal feedback loops. Where do my personal feedback loops begin and where they end? I seem to be part of a sea of loops of energy and matter. These loops exchange (give/+/masculine and receive/-/feminine) chemistry and alchemy of fire, water, air and earth. It is a time of re-alignment and purification through feedback loops within oneself, in one’s environment and the whole sea we call universe.

I bump up against another loop and there is resonance or dissonance. The latter is a clue that something is out of balance and chaotic. I work to make adjustments within and in my environment. I am an alchemist. Old patterns are set in solid matter of diamond quality. What does it take to break up the patterns so light can get in and through? In my experience it takes both humility and bold action. I continue to hold a “wand” with shining light at the tip that serves as a sword when I seek protection. The wand came through this morning from out of the blue. Looks like the wand is for peace and the sword is for conflict. I am wand; I am sword.

She and I talk and hug through our tensions and conflict. Another “she” and I do not. One relationship holds openness of heart, mind and body the other one does not. Alchemy cannot flow to work its magic when there is hard heartedness and mindedness.

What is peace? Peace for me is not about being silent; not making waves. Peace is speaking Truth, creating balance within one’s heart, mind and body and working to spread and hold that balance. Peace is not popular at this time on Mother Earth.

Am I too honest? Is pointed honesty too intense? What is that? Is there such a thing? Mother Earth is off balance because of all the debris buried underground. And now they want to bury more contaminated matter in Japan. Sure, just bury it underground where it’s hidden….denial and stupidity! Demons feed on this underground mess that never gets turned over to decompose. These “attachments” haunt the parts and the whole. Mother Earth needs a major purge and cleansing via fire, water, air and earth. We assist Her in this healing process of evolution. Let us do this conscious work as one body of Light and Love – Love that is transcendent which is beyond human ego.

Strong Shamanic drumming calls for deep looping underground and high looping above ground. These 8 figures flow free without blockage. We work this magic in April 7, 8, 9.

I’m thinking about the sacred site trip with Gregg Braden to Machu Picchu. I don’t need to go anywhere to experience vortex, I don’t need to spend the $, I don’t need a spiritual re-charge. Why would I go to this sacred site? To join others in honoring universal loops of connection. I’m not keen about travelling alone. It’s a lot of left-brain work to connect all the dots and my brain body isn’t up for it. I’m purchasing Fractal Time and listening. Anything can happen…from out of the blue. I am open.

Here’s more honesty to throw on the compost heap to be turned over. Here’s more honesty in the intensely creative process of dark and light. Last night I overate at a class and got sick. My body purged as soon as I got home. It rejected the out of balance matter in my personal universe of feedback loops. And what follows this darkness of resorting to old patterns in fear of being empty and alone? Light! Light that brings with it pictures and information. I don’t understand this at all! Should I not be condemned in Hell forever? Am I not a sinner?

The whole point (of my wand and sword) is that I AM DIVINE and LIFE rules through LOVE and TRUTH. It takes guts to choose this path and stay on it. I am not/we are not the pioneers. We follow many other footsteps and wings. And for these teachers of fire, water, air and earth I drum, we drum. Whew…one huge energy stream moves through me and all I can do is let the tears flow and raise my hands in
acknowledgement with the energetic passion of the "aho" that I hear Native friend Rob say. I am here/we are here as sacred parts of one magnificent whole. Let the changes move. April 9 1 PM is Earth Day ceremony with Rob & Liz. This ceremony has begun!!!

Earlier this stream of consciousness didn't want to stop but here I am in a different gear catching up on emails. Two positive communiques from Transition women which lifts me. One says the editor of our paper is posting our Transition Earth Day UNLEASHING events this week -- she didn't have room in last week's edition. These positive responses tell me light is getting through and the creative process is moving. The other email from Montana re permaculture work her boyfriend is doing in a Buddha garden on Native American land. What a network of loops!

Transmutation

I am keeping the pressure on this woman and her response is that I am "angry" and she is not "safe." I will continue to speak up about negative energy in my relationships and not sweep things under the carpet. Yes, I am a wall negativity hits in a feedback loop. How is it processed? How is it transmuted?


To ____________

Sunday at the Transition meeting you said that Transition Earth Day UNLEASHING events have been done before and there was nothing “new.” You had said this to me before adding that bee activities are the ones new and interesting. I am not aware that Grange, SVA or SVAC has offered an indigenous ceremony, chicken processing or a Transition ROCKS concert and dance. These activities are all new as is the whole context, structure and process of Transition.

I find your comments regarding UNLEASHING to be negative, divisive and simply untrue. Your way of putting something down while promoting your agenda is politics as usual. This is not the way of Transition. Transition is an inclusive circle that honors and respects all the parts by bringing them together in positive light.

Please do not say that you and bees activities were not included. I tried several times to add a bee event to the UNLEASHING schedule and poster. You did not have anything in mind until the last minute when there was a full schedule and the poster needed to go to the printer.

Please stop your negative energy and comments about our UNLEASHING events.

Feedback Loops

I was talking with a friend and noticed that I was multi-tasking while talking. I realized my body was not centered. Was it due to the sweets I had the night before? I spoke to her about this the next day because it was the look in her eye/on her face that alerted me to my lack of centeredness. She didn’t confirm my behavior so perhaps it was an unconscious response from her.

I was complaining about a situation while sitting with two friends. The man sat in silence and his silence helped me look at my language and consider the impact I was having on my environment. I decided to do less complaining and be more pro-active about the negative situation.

Helping on the small farm is challenging. The hoarding and controlling personality refuses to let go of the old to let something new (space and light) in. I’ve been in trouble with this personality a couple of times and it’s stressful. She and I had a pointed conversation that released some underground tension. I emailed that I want harmony in my life and that if we aren’t compatible I want to make a change sooner than later. Relationship hold a variety of feedback loops!

Another challenging round with another personality today. What's my lesson in all this? I am so naive about people and so I get to learn how to protect myself and not get entangled. To rise above and yet to hold my ground. A lesson in balance as my nerves flare up!

Sweet Influences of Plaiedes

Orb in outer space emitted higher Love providing dawn and a dawning experience. Thank you.

Negative space is an ocean of bliss holding matter orb to orb in buoyancy of Love reminding me of Biblical verses from Job38:31:

Canst thou bind the sweet influences of Plaiedes, or lose the bands of Orion

Canst thou bring forth Mozzaroth in his season? or canst thou guide Arcturus with his sons?

Knowest thou the ordinances of heaven? canst thou set the dominion thereof in the earth?